Comments on: When You Exist Primarily Digitally, What Happens IRL?

By: Ron

Ron — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 20:11:48 +0000

In this way, I relate to the millennials. I was on AOL back in the mid-90s when I was still in HS and had a lot of friends online, some of whom I still talk to this day. (And still online)

So it’s never been weird to me, because it’s been such an integral part of my existence for so long, that I can’t really imagine life with it.

I do have lots of vibrant friendships with ‘real’ people, but at the moment, almost all of them are in other places and I have no real ‘local’ friends, so..it changes the game for me a bit.

So I think I’m more grateful for my online existence and yet, I’m certainly the kind of person that you really need to meet and spend time with to “get” and so, it’s very much a love/hate relationship with the web.

I’m currently learning to deal with people who never seem to respond to tweetbacks, but respond to everyone else’s. It’s not personal, but I still hate it and have all sorts of ideas about how to “deal” with it…

See, more reason to not be online at all.

By: insidetimshead

insidetimshead — Sat, 07 Feb 2009 13:59:42 +0000

I’m always fascinated with the studies (the Pew Center has had a few) that find society more connected than every before, but also feeling more isolated than ever. And I know of people who spend all day at an unfulfilling job, go home to do nothing but play games online and then ponder their unhappiness.

Maybe the biggest factor is the difference between understanding the Web as a *community* vis a vis communication. Today’s students who have been building community (without even realizing that’s what they are doing) as long as they can remember can and will move fluidly between the virtual and real lives. I certainly see this among my students.

And I have friends who don’t get the concept of online community as well. Who avoid Twitter because it seems pointless; but then many of these people are now on Facebook after resisting. And repeated attempts to get my mom online continue to prove fruitless. You’d think being able to drop her three sons and her nephew a line on Facebook any time would be encouragement?

In your case, you seem to be well-adjusted to balance it all. I think realizing that’s all it is — a need to create/maintain connections in real life as well as cyberspace — is key.

Oh, and I hate the phone. Totally. Makes me an even bigger fan of the Internet.

By: elenakostovska

elenakostovska — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 14:46:25 +0000

Jess,
good question. In my case my “RL” friends (some of which are coming over to dinner in a just a few hrs) have a completely different view on digital existence from my own. With most of them, I have to do face-to-face if I want to connect (none of them are on Twitter, and I’m often sad about the one dimensional way they use FB). But I see my digital existence as a way to ‘meet’ and connect to people I geographically can’t and learn from and share snippets of life with. Most of it is professional/career related but I do think I am connecting with some folks on a deeper level as well. I’m still having a hard time explaining the concept and the need to some of my RL friends…